today i have mostly been unhappy and alone, which is a shame because it was very nice and sunny. i didn't get in from work til almost 4 am last night, my mum was worried about me walking from work to the car park at that time and waited up for me and gave me a hug when i got in which was sweet i guess.
then this morning was so depressing. my mum came and woke me up telling me that her, my dad and my sister were going to this out of town designer outlet place that i'd never been to and i really wanted to go to, especially as my dad was going and he always treats us when we go shopping. anyway i was too tired and my feet hurt too much i just couldn't get up. the worst part was i'd somehow slipped back into sleep and dreamt that i'd agreed to go, got up and got myself ready. then i was woken up by them leaving and realised it was all a dream and i was all alone and disappointed with my lack of willpower to get up. so in the end i spent the day in the sun in the garden reading 'the bell jar' when my cat, trevor, wasn't trying to rub his face against the corners of it. sounds nice but i was lonely and felt like i'd missed out.
anyway, all i want to do right now is build a den and sit in there with my friends and drink wine and eat sweeties and laugh. when i was sitting in the garden today i really began to miss being at uni and hanging out with my friends there. i remember this one time sarah and i think american jess had built a huge den in their kitchen and we hung out in there and it was literally one of the best things ever.